Her business is important because she has income to buy fruit or pay for some of the school expenses of her daughters. She feels proud when her customers tell her that her food is delicious. She goes out with her cart to offer her products to the merchants in the plaza. As a housewife, she is planning to hire a person to sell food and thus reach more sales locations.
I feel that is an extremely hard decision to decide which group is most deserving of a loan. This group here needs it because not only would it help their business but it would also help the area, bring more crops and supplies in. Now go help them out today!!
Jessi,
ReplyDeleteYou've done a great job of summarizing Maria de Carmen's story, but you haven't specifically addressed your audience. Why should this matter to SBS? When trying to convince someone to donate money, don't be afraid to make it personal.
I like your call to action in the end, especially that you've shown that by helping this group your reader will in fact be helping others.
Jessica,
ReplyDeleteI liked how you stated that if the money was donated towards this group then it would help the whole area, rather than a small group of people. It was brief and to the point and I believe that you put everything that needed to be said.